My Journal 3

July 5, 2007
1:40 am.

Happy Independence Day... Ok, whatever. I'm an almost two hours late, but bear with me...

Today, I had an amazing experience with a woman from England. We spoke about a lot of interesting topics while watching fireworks. She was visiting us, here in the states, and it was her first time seeing fire works. She asked me what did Independence Day mean to me... I took a moment to try to remember what I learned several years ago in a history class.

HA! I remember!

It's a day we celebrate our freedom from the English!

"Does that mean anything to you Americans anymore?"

Honestly... I don't think it does. I feel like America has lost its appreciation of freedom now that we're the ones "freeing" other countries. Isn't that kinda sad? I mean, aside from our mentally retarded president, we are a great freakin country! I'm proud (sometimes) [lol] to be an American.

This day should mean something to me. If it wasn't for our founding daddies, we wouldn't be where we are now as Country... So that's one random thought.

Another question she asked was... "Are you ever afraid...Of terrorism?"

Nah... Never... Why live my life in fear? Wouldn't it suck to live your life in fear, and then die and nothing happened?

Plus, terrorism can strike at anytime, anywhere. If I get blown up tomorrow, well, there ain't much I'll be able to do about it. If it's gonna happen, it's gonna happen regardless of your fear.

So why fear? Why waste your time worrying about something that you have no control over? Just accept the fact that terrorism can happen, and just live your life.

That's what I'm doing. I'm not worried about getting blown up.

I hope you can understand what I'm saying. And if you are that individual who lives in constant fear, I can only hope you take into consideration what I've written here.

That woman from England thanked me, and admitted to me that she was a woman who lived in constant fear. She told me I was right, and that she would try her best not to fear, because she didn't want to be that person who lived and died afraid of something that didn't happen.

Well, anyway reader, I'm exhausted, so I'll quit here... Much love to my faithful fans...

All two of ya'll

(LoL)

July 10, 2007
1:47pm

I've finally come to terms with being single. I almost feel like I don't want (or need) a girl. Shoo, I am proud of myself. I've been feeling this way for quite some time now.

I guess I've been trying my best to keep busy. It's when you’re bored, alone, and not doin anything, that you get down.

If you’re that person, get 3 jobs. lol.

I like how to the dude sitting slightly to my right, (I'm on the train) has these disgusting ugly sneakers... Some uptowns that are black and white. One side all white, and the other all black. Just like the scarface poster.

I'm sure that when he bought them, and even now, he thinks they cool. But I, on the other hand, wanna gag at those sneakers. My point isn't that the man has no style, but that we all have our own definition of style.

I like my dirty old converses. He probably wants to gag at my feet. Ya dig? We all define ourselves.

We've all heard the statement (and I'm paraphrasing)

"If we all look alike, dress alike, thought alike, were alike, then this would be a super boring world"

Yep... I agree...

(I might be late for work... = [ wish me luck)

July 19, 2007
8:52 am

Well I wasn't late that day. In fact, by some miracle, I was early.

Anyhow, I owe a serious apology to all my good friends. And close loved ones and pretty much everyone...

I'm so sorry that I’m never really looking for ya'll. How often do I call people? For most of you guys, our friendship wouldn't exist if not for you looking for me.

I'm sorry I don't look for you. I'm sorry I rarely call you, and I never hang out.

I stay complaining to myself how I'm lonely and what not, but I realize it's my choice. I choose to be lonely. I know that I always got some people I can call...

I make this promise not to you, but to myself... I promise me, that I’m gonna try to change.

Because Lord knows' I need too....

July 23, 2007
8:38pm



It's amazing how life puts us through stuff.

Sometimes, decisions have to be made that are against what we want. Even crazier than that, sometimes what we want isn’t the better thing. We must learn to focus on the better choice... Even if it hurts... Like a flu shot... Hurts like hell, (well for me it does) but it's better for you... With pain and suffering comes growth... 1Love...